The Echo Chamber: A Tiny Play about a Big Fallacy

By Joseph Uranowski
Written 2009 A.D.

Dramatis Personae
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PRAEFECTA, the consul
INTERNA, a tribune
EXTERNUS, a tribune
AEQUITAS, a tribune
CAPITULUS, a tribune

Scene
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Consul Praefecta and four tribunes have exited a meeting with the people of the Academy of Utoria slamming the large wooden door behind them. They converse while walking swiftly towards their fortress.
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Internus: How do we feel that meeting transpire, oh transparent and twice elected Praefecus?
[All five stop walking]

Externa mumbles affirmatively.

Capitulus folds arms.

Aequitas remains silent.

Praefecta: I know not why these students were being so obstinate to our plans. Do we not represent the whole of Utoria? They relinquished their voices and right to speak by exercising their right to vote. An echo is always stronger, louder and purer than its source--

Capitulus: Quite true.

Internus: Most correct.

Praefecta: -- and this undiluted fact should quench the thirst of the zealous crowd not inflame them.

[The continue walking at a lax pace]

Capitulus: May I recount an incident that may explain why students at this academy are blind to the fact that we serve their best interests?

Praefecta: We are listening.

Capitulus: One day Internus and I were walking through the college we all detest, SMC --

[All five spit on the ground]

--We heard two students discussing their views on us, the UTSA. Afraid of being recognized we ducked behind a shrub. Internus had to then find a rock to conceal himself, as the brier couldn’t hide us both. You know that old saying: “One bush cannot conceal two –”

Praefecta: (interrupting) Yes, yes we all know that cliché.

Capitulus: The two students differed on their opinion of our council. One supported solidarity and argued the truth. The other was a traitor to the university. The more agreeable of the two argued that our ability to invoke solely the weaker arguments and yet triumph is an art worth more than a hundred thousand dollars, which is almost equal to our salaries. The other disagreed, saying that the main grievance of SMC is that our attempts to marginalize that college are too transparent and that we do not represent the majority.

Praefecta: Aequitas, how do you defend your college?

Aequitas remains silent.

Internus: That’s preposterous! The very notion that we are not the majority is absurd!

Externa mumbles affirmatively.

Capitulus: We do speak for all the students, right? Now that I think –

Praefecta: Of course we do, I’ll prove it.

[All gather around Praefecta]

Picture a crowd of forty-one-thousand. All gathered in one place. No one there to lead them. What do you notice?

Internus: They are quite noisy. A crowd like that would be very rambunctious.

Praefecta: Exactly. Now, instead of imagining, just remember our last meeting. Were we not equally riotous as the crowd in your imagination?

Capitulus: We were even louder. I can recall many instances where our orations shook the very boardroom table we encircled.

Praefecta: Then it logically flows that we posses the voices of all forty-one-thousand students who attend this academy. We are indistinguishable from a multitude and that is because we represent the masses in everything we say and do.

Internus: What a righteous and natural argument you make.

Externa mumbles affirmatively.

Aequitas remains silent.

Capitulus: That is a most self-evident truth.

Praefecta: I agree. So self-evident that we shall never discuss this topic again.

[They arrive at their fortress where a large bowl of water sits on a table beside a cup of red powder and a cup of sugar. Praefecta mixes the powder, the sugar, and the water and all five drink.]

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